The Griffiths: 2015

Early labor started as prodromal labor 2-3 hours a night 3-4x a week for like 3 weeks around 36-37 weeks... then on Wednesday (4/8) I woke up at one AM and strong, painful contractions were coming every 7 minutes, but weren't getting closer. They were so strong I couldn't sleep. I made Troy take me out to breakfast at TC Eggington's in the morning, just in case this was it and this would be my last meal before things got real.

While we were at breakfast this horrible wall of fatigue hit and fortunately, my body recognized it needed to shut this labor down. The fatigue was stronger than the contractions. They eventually spaced out and stopped completely after going for about 10 hours. That night I decided to go to bed early, JUST IN CASE it happened again. So I got a solid 6 hours, mostly thanks to my heating pad.

Around 330 I woke up and they were every 7 minutes again and too strong to sleep through. I texted Troy's boss at 6 and told him I thought it might be baby day, so I had turned off Troy's alarm to let him sleep, because he was going to need it. Troy and Autumn got up a little later and I told him I didn't think he was going in that day, and I had told my mom to come. Well... the freaking things spaced out again! This was good I guess, because it allowed me to sleep for a couple more hours.

At 10 we went to the midwife and I got my membranes swept. He had turned ROT, so she suggested some things and I asked if the Miles Circuit would be a good idea. She said that would be a good idea, so we sent Autumn to my mom's while we went home and I did the Miles Circuit. Things started to get a bit more intense, but when I felt my belly he was posterior. So I texted the doula and told her I was going to rest, but even though they were coming every 4 minutes, I was hesitant to believe it because I had no mucus plug or bloody show. She told me to lay down and see if they kept coming. Well. They did.

At this point my friend, Rachel, who was in Utah texting me, was stressing out because I was obviously in labor and no one was at the house. I was like, I am way too coherent for this to be labor. I was worried I would get everyone here, and not even really be in labor, and everyone would be mad at me. Well... It turns out she was right... It would have been the ideal time to get everyone there, but Troy and I were both just sure that we had seen how I am in active labor, and this was NOT it! I was way too calm and collected and coping way too well. But I decided that the timer said it was active labor so I better get everyone there in an hour or so. Troy started on his list of birth preparations like filling the tub with air and hot water. It was a longer process than we anticipated... or maybe it was just the birth was much shorter. :)

The doula, Julie, and my talented photographer friend Ashley were coming in about an hour. The midwife, Crystal, was ready to come as soon as I decided I needed her and was just a short 5 minutes away. I decided I wanted to look cute in pictures so I asked my sister to come do my hair. I took a shower and it felt sooooooo good. But I had to get out fast because my sister was coming. At this point the contractions were getting stronger to the point my hormones were making me shake. Alright, maaaaybe this might be a little real.

My mom came and things were getting stronger and I had to start to vocalize through contractions and grab walls, doorways and counters to sway through contractions. My mom was on snack and hydration duty for me. Little did we know it would go so fast that the only time anyone would eat would be after all was said and done. My sister arrived and asked where I wanted to sit to do my hair. I laughed and was like... no. Well I decided I could sit on the birthing ball. So she did my hair and I asked her to make cake with Autumn for the baby's birthday and told her, 'This is why I waited until labor to ask. You have to say yes now.' She laughed and was like, 'I will humor you.' I texted the midwife and told her things were getting more intense so maybe she should come, but it wasn't urgent so no need to rush. Around about now I started to feel a little head rush as the hormones were kicking in to help me to cope. I checked on baby again and he had moved to ROA. (Yay!) That was the last time I personally checked on him to see how his position was.

Julie walked in around 4 after I had called to tell her to leave the driveway open for midwives, but due to contractions, I had to pass the phone to Troy because I couldn't do anything except focus on vocalizing through the contraction. Things were definitely stepping up to the next level. In my head it went from conversational breaks to wanting to just say 'Don't talk to me, but DO NOT LEAVE ME!' I was feeling myself getting into the zone to focus on the task at hand. However, I was still totally aware of my surroundings and the people, unlike last time where I went so far into labor land that I was absolutely gone mentally and emotionally.

Julie told me she was concerned if I stayed standing up through contractions I would wear myself out. She suggested hands and knees and I think I told her no. She let me do another contraction standing and then suggested hands and knees again. So I reluctantly agreed to go lean over my ball to rock and relax through contractions. Julie helped me to open my hips so that Jack could descend. She used ice and a cool washcloth and massaged my back and helped me through. She asked me if noises were bothering me, and they weren't. My biggest concern was feeling like I was going to wet myself. It was around about this time I considered joking and saying, 'Can I get the epidural now?' But I lost my desire to joke at all at this point and just kept telling Julie, 'It hurts!' She kept comforting me and telling me things like, 'I know it does, but you are doing so good!'

I kept wanting to ask her if she thought I was getting close to transition or not, but was really scared of the answer. If it was no, then I had a long way to go. If it was yes... well, then I was about to go into transition. Around this moment, Crystal, my midwife walked through the door and Troy and my mom were talking in the kitchen. I was so angry that I just yelled, 'Be Quiet!' I heard Julie letting Crystal know this was a sudden change in my coping and so Crystal knew that meant she needed to get on getting birth supplies ready quickly. Apparently, I unintentionally lied when I told her it wasn't urgent. :) Whoops.

I heard Ashley come in, and I don't really know if Dianah, the other midwife, was there at this point or not. I remember everyone else coming in besides her. Julie convinced me we should move positions and go sit to labor on the toilet. I wasn't happy about this again, but crawled my way from the living room to the bathroom to labor on the toilet. Julie helped me remember to keep my pelvis open as I labored there and I was thinking, 'Dear heavens, PLEASE let this be transition!' The contractions were incredibly strong and I could feel his head descending into the birth canal. I labored there and I kept telling Julie, 'This hurts so much,' 'I don't want to do this,' 'I can't do this for several more hours,' and 'Is it just me or is this going fast?' between contractions. She helped me rock through them and breathe through them and said, 'We are going to rock this baby out.' I was shocked at how quiet I was compared to Autumn's birth. I was aware of the baby and not deep in labor land, although it may have looked that way from the outside.

My brain kept telling me all the kinds of things I have spent the last couple of years studying and affirmations kept coming to mind. Some of them I couldn't remember the whole affirmation in the moment so I would hold on to pieces that I could... "Soften, open, release," "I relinquish control," and "This is for someone I love as much as Autumn," were the ones I used the most. I also focussed on my pain coping techniques from Birthing From Within. The most useful was, 'Focus on your out breath," followed by "Breathe, see, hear, touch."

I asked Julie to have the midwife come check the baby, and the midwife told me she was actually just on her way in to do that. When she came in the dark bathroom she used such a calm, soft voice and it really contributed to the sense of peace at the birth. They listen to baby's heart during contractions to be sure baby is responding appropriately. He was doing great and exactly what he should, however, I couldn't hear it on the Doppler during my contraction at first. I heard it after what was probably a few seconds, but if it wasn't for everyone around me telling me they could hear his heart, I would have been scared. They did a great job at meeting me where I was at and assuring me all was well. I could feel him SO low in the birth canal I knew it wouldn't be long, and I began aggressively requesting the tub around now. But since Troy and I weren't sure about an hour earlier... it wasn't ready. (The thought in my head at that specific moment: Why didn't I listen to Rachel and we could have been an hour+ ahead on this filling the pool business?)

Julie kept telling me I was closer than I thought and that I was doing better than most at this stage. Then my water broke. I had an, 'Oh $&!;#*€#,!' Moment in my head because I knew water breaking intensifies the following contractions. Crystal came in to check the fluid to be sure it was clear of meconium. It was, but when she checked I had finally lost my plug and had bloody show. Now I finally knew I was really in labor! ;) They told me the tub would be ready in a few more minutes. Just 2 more contractions and I could get in. Well, the next 2 contractions were pushing contractions. I had been feeling the baby in my birth canal for awhile now, and had to keep reaching down to be sure I wasn't going to have my baby in the toilet.

The second I heard the hose turn off in the tub, I bolted straight for the tub and jumped in on hands and knees and my body was pushing like there was no tomorrow. Troy was sitting on our bed and I had my head on the side of the pool by him, and he rubbed my cheek between pushes and it was so nice. Crystal told me if I wanted my top off for skin to skin, this would be the time because I wouldn't have another chance. I took my tank top off and resumed pushing with the urge. She kept reminding me to take it slowly and kept telling me I was stretching beautifully and kept my mind on preserving my perineum, not just getting baby out. I focused on allowing my body to do the pushing with contractions and not pushing any more than that. He came quickly, but only as fast as my body was telling me to... and as such, I totally understand the ring of fire references now. That was an intense moment in time. Haha.

I managed to push his head out and then my contractions stopped as I felt him wiggling in the birth canal to find a position to get his shoulders out. His head was out for 3 minutes under the water (which is fine - he had been living in fluid for 9 months prior and still was receiving oxygen via the placenta, so this truly wasn't a problem, it was just a bit longer than usual) and then Crystal had me move one foot up by my hands as she gently helped him rotate and I was then able to push his shoulders out. And then his hips were caught, so I had to push again and he was out at 5:22. Troy and I laugh because this is what our texts to friends look like, '3:30 - Meh... I'm not sure. Probably tomorrow.' '5:30 - He is here.' (Ok, we weren't texting that quickly after, but you get the idea.)

His head had come above water in the process so I moved over to get in a position to take him since he couldn't be under water anymore and I flipped over and he went on my chest and he gave us a little cry and then decided it was time to nap. I was freaked out by that briefly, but Crystal had her stethoscope out listening to his lungs and heart and told me, nope, he's fine. (At a postpartum visit she told me she knew he was fine, because she had seen this once before where the baby came out completely relaxed.) He really was just taking a nap. There was a bunch of cheesy vernix floating in the water and once he decided to interact a little, he kept sticking his tongue out at us. I told him I was so glad he was here, thank you for coming, and happy birthday.

I spent the next half hour repeatedly trying to deliver the placenta but it wasn't coming. It has released from my uterus but had suctioned basically inside the birth the birth canal. The 'rules' say mom has to deliver the placenta in 60 minutes at a homebirth, so I knew the clock was ticking. Troy took off his shirt so that he could take Jack and they had some sweet snuggle time while we dealt with this. Crystal helped put my mind at ease about the time limit. Around half an hour we decided to try to deliver it 'on land'. Dianah set up a path and orchestrated chux pads between the tub and my bed to protect the carpet from all the birthiness. We moved to the bed and it came out quickly there.

I had minimal tearing, which was such a relief after Autumn. It only required the equivalent of one temporary stitch that was removed 2 days later. The midwives kept an eye on us for awhile, and I took some tinctures, I think for cramping and bleeding that helped and ibuprofen. I had snacks and the midwives cleaned up everything and set up a siphon so that the tub would drain overnight. After they were sure we were stable they gave us directions and Crystal has remained on call for us 24/7 in my postpartum period. We haven't had anything worse than after birth contractions to call about, though. :) She came and did a follow up visit on Saturday and it was so great to have her fill in some missing pieces in my birth story, as did Julie while she worked as a postpartum doula a couple of days when Troy had to work that first week.

They asked me if I wanted to see the placenta... um.... YES! (I know, so weird.) Diana gave me a glove and showed me all sorts of things about it, and I got to feel it and stretch the amniotic sac. It was amazing and looked so much bigger and healthier than Autumn's. It was very cool.

My biggest shock with this birth was how efficiently my body worked, and how calm, peaceful and positive the experience was. Yes, it hurt. But somehow pain and peace were there simultaneously. It wasn't even a matter of looking back on it, it wasn't bad, it was peaceful IN THE MOMENT. I am still trying to process how something could hurt so much but be so perfect at the exact same time. It is causing a major paradigm shift on my thoughts about birth, in a very good way.

......

Oh, and almost as awesome as the baby, was not having to take Diclegis or Zofran that night, or at all since giving birth, AND not being nauseous anymore! Birth cured my HG. :)

The Griffiths

Me & Troy!

Monday, April 27, 2015

Jack's Birth

Monday, March 2, 2015

Baby Shower